When sage Yagyavalky decided to go to forest for spiritual quest, he divided his property among two wives equally Maitreyi and Katyayani. But Maitryi, asked,’Will this material wealth make me (the soul) happy?’ Yagyavalky replied negatively and in the flow of conversation he gave beautiful explanation of love.

He said, ‘No wife loves husband for happiness of husband but wife loves husband to seek self happiness (happiness of soul). No husband loves wife for happiness of wife but husband loves wife to seek self happiness (happiness of soul). No parent love son or daughter for happiness of son or daughter but parent love son or daughter to seek self happiness (happiness of soul). No one loves wealth for wealth’s sake and but everyone loves wealth to seek self happiness (happiness of soul). No one loves relations for happiness of relatives and but everyone loves relatives to seek self happiness (happiness of soul). No one loves protector for protector’s happiness and but everyone loves protector to seek self happiness (happiness of soul). No one loves scholar or entertainer for scholar’s happiness and but everyone loves scholar or entertainer to seek self happiness (happiness of soul). No one loves Demigod for Demigod’s happiness and but everyone loves Demigod to seek self happiness (happiness of soul). No one loves anyone for others happiness and but everyone loves others to seek self happiness (happiness of soul). O! Maitreyi, hear this seriously, ponder over it again again and keep this in the mind all the time.’ This is the message from Brihadkaranyopnishad (Hindu scripture).

In short love for beauty, skill, sports, power, husband, wife, son, daughter, father, mother, any relation are all to seek self happiness. Remove the self happiness love will reduce to zero. If you stop deceiving yourself on being loved, you will definitely take a U turn to God who loves all for others happiness. You will then realize his love.